1 00:00:06,000 --> 00:00:12,074 Advertise your product or brand here contact www.OpenSubtitles.org today 2 00:00:16,440 --> 00:00:19,955 the man of today 3 00:00:20,040 --> 00:00:23,510 I'm happy to say 4 00:00:23,600 --> 00:00:26,797 a man on his way 5 00:00:26,880 --> 00:00:29,792 6 00:00:29,880 --> 00:00:33,316 enjoying the sun 7 00:00:33,400 --> 00:00:36,915 if a dark cloud should come 8 00:00:37,000 --> 00:00:40,151 that I've waited for 9 00:00:40,240 --> 00:00:43,755 of the moment evermore 10 00:00:43,840 --> 00:00:47,116 11 00:00:47,200 --> 00:00:50,670 and to leave 'em 12 00:00:50,760 --> 00:00:54,070 13 00:00:54,160 --> 00:00:57,232 you can believe 'em 14 00:00:57,320 --> 00:01:00,471 enjoying the sun 15 00:01:00,560 --> 00:01:04,189 if a dark cloud should come 16 00:01:04,280 --> 00:01:07,511 that I've waited for 17 00:01:07,600 --> 00:01:12,958 of the moment evermore 18 00:01:49,960 --> 00:01:53,509 All right. I'll see they all know. Right. Goodbye. 19 00:01:54,760 --> 00:01:59,117 - Morning, Florrie. Mr Vavistock. - Morning, Norman. 20 00:01:59,200 --> 00:02:01,714 Hey! Fancy the guv being late! 21 00:02:01,800 --> 00:02:04,189 He's not coming in. He's got the flu. 22 00:02:04,280 --> 00:02:07,238 What a time to pick, with Tidmarsh on leave. 23 00:02:07,320 --> 00:02:10,392 - Looks like you'll be in charge today! - Yeah. 24 00:02:12,280 --> 00:02:16,034 Yeah! Acting chief filing clerk! Me! 25 00:02:19,160 --> 00:02:22,835 - Mrs Burton, that'll be all, thank you. - Oh! 26 00:02:22,920 --> 00:02:26,230 Well, don't stand there, woman. Go on, run along. 27 00:02:28,160 --> 00:02:29,832 Florrie... 28 00:02:29,920 --> 00:02:32,992 You fell for that one, didn't you? 29 00:02:33,080 --> 00:02:35,594 Oh, Norman! 30 00:02:35,680 --> 00:02:38,513 I thought for a minute you were serious! 31 00:02:42,360 --> 00:02:43,998 Oh, dear. 32 00:02:54,480 --> 00:02:56,471 Morning, Sonia. 33 00:03:03,360 --> 00:03:05,635 You and your film star. 34 00:03:07,160 --> 00:03:09,230 - I saw her last night. - You never! 35 00:03:09,320 --> 00:03:11,311 - I did. - In the flesh? 36 00:03:11,400 --> 00:03:13,914 - No, in the pictures. - Ah. 37 00:03:14,000 --> 00:03:17,834 She weren't half smashing. I saw it round twice. 38 00:03:17,920 --> 00:03:22,277 If it isn't too inconvenient, would you kindly get out the files 39 00:03:22,360 --> 00:03:26,717 on Persian mineral deposits, eastern substrata and pipeline personal? 40 00:03:26,800 --> 00:03:29,758 Yes, sir. Acting chief filing clerk. 41 00:03:29,840 --> 00:03:33,913 Persian mineral deposits, eastern substrata, pipeline personal. 42 00:03:34,000 --> 00:03:35,956 A, J, K. 43 00:03:46,400 --> 00:03:48,118 Sorry to be so long, sir. 44 00:03:50,480 --> 00:03:51,993 Tea up. 45 00:03:52,080 --> 00:03:54,230 Well then, gentlemen, 46 00:03:54,320 --> 00:03:59,110 you will be wondering about the renewed interest in Tawaki. 47 00:03:59,200 --> 00:04:02,795 Recent developments in the Pacific have highlighted it 48 00:04:02,880 --> 00:04:05,519 as a possible base of great importance. 49 00:04:06,880 --> 00:04:09,713 One of the islands is uninhabited. 50 00:04:09,800 --> 00:04:12,473 It has an excellent anchorage, 51 00:04:12,560 --> 00:04:15,313 sheltered by an extinct volcano. 52 00:04:15,400 --> 00:04:18,995 Many other countries have been in touch with the Queen of Tawaki, 53 00:04:19,080 --> 00:04:23,596 who is undecided whether to accept or refuse their offers. 54 00:04:25,040 --> 00:04:28,350 Gentlemen, your job at the Geneva Conference 55 00:04:28,440 --> 00:04:32,353 will be to get a decision in our favour. 56 00:04:32,440 --> 00:04:34,556 - Is that clear? - Yes, sir. 57 00:04:34,640 --> 00:04:38,997 Very well. Jackson, get any files you have on Tawaki sent up. 58 00:04:39,080 --> 00:04:40,593 Right away, sir. 59 00:04:43,920 --> 00:04:46,275 Filing room? Oh, Vavistock. 60 00:04:46,360 --> 00:04:48,874 Away? Then Tidmarsh. 61 00:04:48,960 --> 00:04:51,474 Away too? Then who am I talking to? 62 00:04:52,480 --> 00:04:56,439 Norman? Very well, Norman. Send up any files you have on Tawaki. 63 00:04:56,520 --> 00:04:59,114 With the utmost celerity, sir. 64 00:05:01,760 --> 00:05:05,673 If that's that the Tawaki file, hurry up. Mr Jackson's waiting. 65 00:05:05,760 --> 00:05:08,274 Norman? Here a minute. 66 00:05:09,360 --> 00:05:11,271 - Are you going in there? - Yeah. 67 00:05:11,360 --> 00:05:15,035 Take the tea trolley for me, will you? It's my tea break. 68 00:05:16,520 --> 00:05:18,795 Isn't it marvellous? 69 00:05:18,880 --> 00:05:22,395 I cannot overstress the importance our government places 70 00:05:22,480 --> 00:05:24,710 upon this conference at Geneva. 71 00:05:25,760 --> 00:05:28,877 I had a chat with the PM only yesterday. 72 00:05:28,960 --> 00:05:31,474 - And he said... - Tea up! 73 00:05:31,560 --> 00:05:33,312 Well, bring it in, boy! 74 00:05:33,400 --> 00:05:35,277 (Trolley squeaking) 75 00:05:35,360 --> 00:05:38,909 (Shouting) As I was saying, I had a chat with the PM yesterday 76 00:05:39,000 --> 00:05:41,389 and he said... 77 00:05:47,120 --> 00:05:49,236 - As I was saying... - (Clunking) 78 00:05:49,320 --> 00:05:52,232 ..I had a chat with the PM and he said... 79 00:05:52,320 --> 00:05:55,232 - (Squeaking) - .."Horace..." 80 00:05:58,120 --> 00:06:00,315 - Why do you have this? - I brought it... 81 00:06:00,400 --> 00:06:03,949 - Never mind. Serve the tea. - I'm not the tea boy! 82 00:06:04,040 --> 00:06:06,270 - I'm the acting chief... - Shh! 83 00:06:08,160 --> 00:06:11,072 - Oh. - Let's get down to details. 84 00:06:11,160 --> 00:06:15,551 One thing, Jackson. How many members do you envisage in the delegation? 85 00:06:15,640 --> 00:06:17,471 - Five. - How many? 86 00:06:17,560 --> 00:06:19,278 Five. 87 00:06:21,680 --> 00:06:24,194 I'm sorry. I mean eight. 88 00:06:29,000 --> 00:06:32,675 I beg your pardon, but this says there are six delegates. 89 00:06:32,760 --> 00:06:34,671 My mistake. Six. 90 00:06:34,760 --> 00:06:38,309 I wish you'd make up your mind. They've melted now. 91 00:06:38,400 --> 00:06:40,960 Is there anything of value on the island? 92 00:06:41,040 --> 00:06:44,635 - Milk? - No. No milk. Maybe a little oil. 93 00:06:44,720 --> 00:06:46,517 Ain't it marvellous? 94 00:06:46,600 --> 00:06:51,276 I'm not clear about this island's position in relation to the mainland. 95 00:06:51,360 --> 00:06:53,510 It's all quite clear on the map here. 96 00:06:53,600 --> 00:06:56,160 Let me show you. Now, er...let me see. 97 00:06:56,240 --> 00:06:58,310 - Where do you want it, sir? - Just there. 98 00:06:59,840 --> 00:07:02,308 - Take that away. - You said... 99 00:07:02,400 --> 00:07:04,356 Take it away! 100 00:07:05,440 --> 00:07:07,749 Am I right in saying just there? 101 00:07:07,840 --> 00:07:09,876 No, not there. There. 102 00:07:12,160 --> 00:07:14,310 Will you take that away? 103 00:07:14,400 --> 00:07:16,994 Oh, have a cake. 104 00:07:17,080 --> 00:07:20,197 - Are there any rocks? - Only one. Who's going to have it? 105 00:07:21,680 --> 00:07:23,318 Will you get out? 106 00:07:23,400 --> 00:07:26,551 There'll be six travelling. Shall I lay on the transport? 107 00:07:26,640 --> 00:07:29,552 - I take it we're going by air. - Coming down. 108 00:07:43,800 --> 00:07:46,314 I think we've covered everything now. 109 00:07:46,400 --> 00:07:48,994 Take a filing clerk with you, Jackson. 110 00:07:49,080 --> 00:07:51,594 Yes, sir. I'll see to that right away. 111 00:07:55,760 --> 00:07:58,558 Oh! Where's that wretched tea boy? 112 00:07:58,640 --> 00:08:00,232 Who wants me? 113 00:08:03,360 --> 00:08:05,430 - Who did that? - Get out! 114 00:08:06,520 --> 00:08:08,715 Get out! 115 00:08:21,280 --> 00:08:25,398 If you spent less time studying movie stars and more on your job... 116 00:08:25,480 --> 00:08:27,914 - Where's Mr Vavistock? - Flu. 117 00:08:28,000 --> 00:08:30,070 - Where to? - No, sir, he's got flu. 118 00:08:30,160 --> 00:08:32,116 - Where's his deputy? - On leave. 119 00:08:32,200 --> 00:08:34,191 - Where's his deputy? - That's me. 120 00:08:34,280 --> 00:08:36,316 - Good. Got a passport? - No, sir. 121 00:08:36,400 --> 00:08:39,676 Get one. Got any passport photos? You'll need two. 122 00:08:39,760 --> 00:08:41,751 I've got this one, sir. 123 00:08:41,840 --> 00:08:45,958 That's me in the football team. See if you can find me. 124 00:08:46,040 --> 00:08:48,759 - Go on. Pick me out. - No, that won't do. 125 00:08:48,840 --> 00:08:51,195 Haven't you got one by yourself? 126 00:08:51,280 --> 00:08:53,669 I've got this one. There you are. 127 00:08:53,760 --> 00:08:55,751 It's not my body, of course. 128 00:08:55,840 --> 00:08:58,308 You'd better get some done. File these. 129 00:08:58,400 --> 00:09:01,551 That's all I've got. Except one from when I was a baby. 130 00:09:03,000 --> 00:09:06,390 - What are you doing up there? - Putting these away. 131 00:09:06,480 --> 00:09:09,517 Go and get your passport photos taken. 132 00:09:09,600 --> 00:09:12,831 - What do I want photos for? - You're going away tomorrow. 133 00:09:12,920 --> 00:09:15,639 - Me? Where? - Geneva. 134 00:09:15,720 --> 00:09:18,792 Geneva? Me? Aargh! Aargh! Hey! 135 00:09:18,880 --> 00:09:21,155 Hey! 136 00:09:22,240 --> 00:09:24,310 - (Knocking) - Come in. 137 00:09:24,400 --> 00:09:27,676 - Good morning. - Good morning. 138 00:09:27,760 --> 00:09:30,274 - It's a lovely day. - Perfectly glorious. 139 00:09:30,360 --> 00:09:34,512 - The sun's shining and... - Can you take a passport photograph? 140 00:09:34,600 --> 00:09:37,353 - Yes, of course. Do sit down. - Thank you. 141 00:09:40,240 --> 00:09:42,595 - (Hissing) - Oh! 142 00:09:42,680 --> 00:09:45,069 Well, get off it, then! 143 00:09:45,160 --> 00:09:48,675 Oh! Ho! Thank you. 144 00:09:48,760 --> 00:09:50,830 Quite still, please. 145 00:09:52,320 --> 00:09:56,711 - Ready? - Oh! Ha, not me. Him. 146 00:10:05,440 --> 00:10:06,953 No smiling, please. 147 00:10:07,040 --> 00:10:09,713 I'm not. I've got a light stuck right in me face. 148 00:10:09,800 --> 00:10:12,439 Unfortunately, we have got to see you. 149 00:10:13,480 --> 00:10:18,508 I cannot take you smiling. A passport photograph must not look pleasant. 150 00:10:18,600 --> 00:10:22,639 - And please remove your hat. - I don't want to take me hat off! 151 00:10:22,720 --> 00:10:24,312 Oh... 152 00:10:24,400 --> 00:10:26,789 Would you like to go somewhere else? 153 00:10:26,880 --> 00:10:32,000 - You can't. The Ministry sent him here. - You know where you can go. 154 00:10:33,120 --> 00:10:36,510 Come out of it. I'll show you. 155 00:10:40,280 --> 00:10:42,794 Ah. Very good. Very good indeed. 156 00:10:42,880 --> 00:10:44,996 Now... 157 00:10:52,280 --> 00:10:54,396 No smiling, please. 158 00:10:57,440 --> 00:10:59,954 Control yourself, please! 159 00:11:00,040 --> 00:11:04,556 I can't help it! The more you stop me, the more I seem to can't help it! 160 00:11:05,920 --> 00:11:07,399 Pull yourself together! 161 00:11:10,640 --> 00:11:13,074 I've got it... Oh, it's going! 162 00:11:22,080 --> 00:11:25,755 Go on! Go on. Now, force yourself. Go on. 163 00:11:25,840 --> 00:11:29,276 That's it. Go on. 164 00:11:39,400 --> 00:11:41,595 Control yourself! 165 00:11:43,360 --> 00:11:46,636 Come on, then. Go on, take me. 166 00:11:46,720 --> 00:11:49,598 Take me! You're too late! 167 00:11:51,800 --> 00:11:55,509 You missed it again! Here, look. I'll put this... 168 00:11:57,520 --> 00:12:00,432 I'll put this over me face. 169 00:12:01,200 --> 00:12:03,077 Go! 170 00:12:05,880 --> 00:12:08,758 It's no good! 171 00:12:18,160 --> 00:12:21,038 Leave me alone. You go look at your camera. 172 00:12:31,080 --> 00:12:35,073 - Where you been? - Leave my studio immediately! 173 00:12:37,320 --> 00:12:39,754 - I shall sue you for this. - Really? 174 00:12:39,840 --> 00:12:42,513 Oh! Oh... (Mumbling) 175 00:12:48,320 --> 00:12:50,231 Got it. 176 00:12:55,160 --> 00:12:58,755 - Now, are we all here, Mitchell? - Everybody except the filing clerk. 177 00:12:58,840 --> 00:13:01,400 Filing clerk not here? What a nuisance. 178 00:13:01,480 --> 00:13:05,155 Never mind. He'll have to follow on later. I think it's this way. 179 00:13:10,480 --> 00:13:12,914 What in heaven's name...? 180 00:13:14,200 --> 00:13:16,794 Oh, no! Not you. 181 00:13:21,760 --> 00:13:24,194 Why, you...! 182 00:13:24,280 --> 00:13:27,989 - Oh! - Sorry, miss. 183 00:13:36,400 --> 00:13:39,949 - Would you take your seat? - I'm getting off at the next stop. 184 00:13:40,040 --> 00:13:43,635 You're not allowed to stand, sir. There is a seat vacant up here. 185 00:13:46,240 --> 00:13:49,312 Be careful. You've done enough damage for one day. 186 00:13:49,400 --> 00:13:52,039 Would you fasten your belt please, sir? 187 00:13:52,120 --> 00:13:55,351 - I don't wear one. - I mean your safety belt, sir. 188 00:13:55,440 --> 00:13:58,557 Oh! I thought you were getting me at it! 189 00:13:58,640 --> 00:14:00,835 - Allow me. - Thank you. 190 00:14:14,720 --> 00:14:17,280 - Sonia! - I beg your pardon? 191 00:14:17,360 --> 00:14:21,239 Sorry. Picture of Sonia Karol. Famous film star. 192 00:14:21,320 --> 00:14:23,993 I reckon she's smashing. 193 00:14:24,080 --> 00:14:27,470 When you've finished with that, can I have it? Please? 194 00:14:27,560 --> 00:14:30,632 Well, yes, in a minute. 195 00:14:30,720 --> 00:14:33,154 Thank you very much. 196 00:14:33,240 --> 00:14:35,629 Do you collect film stars' photographs? 197 00:14:35,720 --> 00:14:39,429 Only hers. I've got 107! 198 00:14:39,520 --> 00:14:41,431 Oh, sorry. 199 00:14:42,520 --> 00:14:44,909 I think she's wonderful. 200 00:14:45,000 --> 00:14:47,230 You must do. 201 00:14:47,320 --> 00:14:50,357 - Enjoying your trip, madam? - Very much, thank you. 202 00:14:50,440 --> 00:14:53,671 - Everything all right, sir? - Yes, thank you. Very nice. 203 00:14:53,760 --> 00:14:55,990 Always is on this line. 204 00:14:56,080 --> 00:14:58,833 - Who was that? - The pilot. 205 00:14:59,920 --> 00:15:02,354 Pilot? Well, who's driving, then? 206 00:15:02,440 --> 00:15:04,237 Hey! 207 00:15:04,320 --> 00:15:07,118 There is another pilot, you know. 208 00:15:32,560 --> 00:15:34,949 (All exclaiming) 209 00:15:42,760 --> 00:15:46,150 - You're the British delegation? - Quite right. 210 00:15:46,240 --> 00:15:49,949 - There will be no baggage examination. - Thank you. 211 00:16:03,440 --> 00:16:06,034 Hey, what's your game? 212 00:16:18,520 --> 00:16:20,556 - Garfield? - Yes? 213 00:16:20,640 --> 00:16:22,790 - There you are. - Cooper? 214 00:16:22,880 --> 00:16:25,519 - I am here. - You could have got it yourself. 215 00:16:25,600 --> 00:16:27,477 Lloyd? Lloyd! 216 00:16:27,560 --> 00:16:29,357 Hey, Lloydy, come on. Wake up! 217 00:16:29,440 --> 00:16:32,113 That's private. You can look after the heavy stuff. 218 00:16:32,200 --> 00:16:35,670 There's one here with no name on. Whose is this with no name on? 219 00:16:35,760 --> 00:16:37,955 Ain't it marvellous? 220 00:16:38,040 --> 00:16:41,316 Hey, it's mine! I'll take that. 221 00:16:41,400 --> 00:16:43,550 Mitchell. Here y'are. 222 00:16:43,640 --> 00:16:45,631 - Jennings? - Yes? 223 00:16:45,720 --> 00:16:47,517 Jackson. There y'are. 224 00:16:47,600 --> 00:16:50,478 I'll look after this lot. You can wash and brush up. 225 00:16:50,560 --> 00:16:53,393 - Will you kindly control yourself? - What's up? 226 00:16:53,480 --> 00:16:55,357 Keep your voice down! 227 00:16:55,440 --> 00:16:58,989 - (Softly) What's up? - Oh... This way, gentlemen. 228 00:17:04,640 --> 00:17:07,108 - What room am I in, please? - Your name? 229 00:17:07,200 --> 00:17:09,430 Norman. With the British delegation. 230 00:17:09,520 --> 00:17:12,239 I'm afraid there is no reservation. 231 00:17:12,320 --> 00:17:14,675 What, they left me out? 232 00:17:14,760 --> 00:17:17,149 Hey, Mr Jackson! Mr Jackson! 233 00:17:17,240 --> 00:17:20,550 - I ain't got nowhere to sleep. - I forgot all about you. 234 00:17:20,640 --> 00:17:23,598 - Would you look after my filing clerk? - Yes, sir. 235 00:17:23,680 --> 00:17:25,955 - This is he. - Yes, sir. 236 00:17:27,040 --> 00:17:29,395 Sign here, Mr Norman. 237 00:17:38,440 --> 00:17:40,590 We are very busy. 238 00:17:42,920 --> 00:17:45,593 Top floor. Room 700. 239 00:17:45,680 --> 00:17:47,352 700. 240 00:17:47,440 --> 00:17:48,668 Sorry! 241 00:17:48,760 --> 00:17:52,435 - Have you got the key? - Key? 242 00:17:55,920 --> 00:17:59,117 - Room 700, please. - Oui, monsieur. 243 00:18:00,040 --> 00:18:01,439 Septi�me. 244 00:18:01,520 --> 00:18:05,638 The top floor is for staff. The staff is not allowed to use the lift. 245 00:18:05,720 --> 00:18:08,109 - Oh, I can use the stairs, then? - Oui. 246 00:18:08,200 --> 00:18:10,156 You're very kind. 247 00:18:12,280 --> 00:18:14,316 I'm only here for a week! 248 00:18:49,960 --> 00:18:52,030 Cor blimey. 249 00:19:06,400 --> 00:19:08,755 (Laughing) Smashing! 250 00:19:11,680 --> 00:19:13,636 Ah! Ah! 251 00:19:22,320 --> 00:19:24,276 (Whistle) 252 00:19:34,920 --> 00:19:36,399 - Oh! - Ooh! 253 00:19:36,480 --> 00:19:40,519 - Sorry. - It'd have to be you, wouldn't it? 254 00:19:40,600 --> 00:19:43,114 - Yes. Er...no. - What a nice surprise. 255 00:19:43,200 --> 00:19:44,519 - Is it? - No. 256 00:19:44,600 --> 00:19:47,876 - Funny we should bump into each other. - Most amusing. 257 00:19:52,760 --> 00:19:55,991 - Isn't it marvellous? Hey, miss! - Yes. 258 00:19:56,080 --> 00:19:59,436 Miss, I know I'm awkward but I really am sorry. 259 00:20:07,360 --> 00:20:10,113 That was nice of you. Is this your first trip? 260 00:20:10,200 --> 00:20:13,237 - Yes. And yours? - Mm, I'm on holiday. 261 00:20:13,320 --> 00:20:16,437 - What are you doing? - I'm with the British delegation. 262 00:20:16,520 --> 00:20:19,193 - I'm attending a conference. - Really? 263 00:20:19,280 --> 00:20:22,955 - I'm chief filing clerk. - How interesting. 264 00:20:24,040 --> 00:20:26,679 A very responsible job. 265 00:20:26,760 --> 00:20:29,035 Yes, I'm sure it is. 266 00:20:29,800 --> 00:20:31,756 (Yodelling) 267 00:20:37,880 --> 00:20:39,359 (Mouthing) 268 00:20:39,440 --> 00:20:41,396 (lnaudible) 269 00:20:47,400 --> 00:20:50,790 270 00:20:50,880 --> 00:20:54,350 271 00:20:54,440 --> 00:20:58,194 272 00:20:58,280 --> 00:21:02,159 273 00:21:02,240 --> 00:21:06,358 the Swiss always say 274 00:21:06,440 --> 00:21:10,228 275 00:21:10,320 --> 00:21:14,108 or enjoying their play 276 00:21:14,200 --> 00:21:17,829 277 00:21:17,920 --> 00:21:21,879 and when they're romancing 278 00:21:21,960 --> 00:21:25,919 keeps your worries away 279 00:21:26,000 --> 00:21:29,993 the bells even play 280 00:21:30,080 --> 00:21:33,868 281 00:21:33,960 --> 00:21:38,033 the Swiss always say 282 00:21:38,120 --> 00:21:41,715 283 00:21:41,800 --> 00:21:45,793 or enjoying their play 284 00:21:45,880 --> 00:21:49,839 - - (Expert yodelling) 285 00:21:49,920 --> 00:21:53,913 and when they're romancing 286 00:21:54,000 --> 00:21:57,913 keeps your worries away 287 00:21:58,000 --> 00:22:04,075 the bells even play... 288 00:22:04,160 --> 00:22:06,276 (lntricate yodelling) 289 00:22:09,360 --> 00:22:11,874 (Continues yodelling) 290 00:22:15,680 --> 00:22:18,274 (Mouths intricate yodelling) 291 00:22:23,320 --> 00:22:25,356 Oh! 292 00:22:31,680 --> 00:22:33,910 Penny! 293 00:22:44,480 --> 00:22:46,357 - Good morning. - Morning. 294 00:22:46,440 --> 00:22:49,273 There are details to discuss on ltem 17. 295 00:22:49,360 --> 00:22:51,999 - I'll ring for breakfast. - Yes, right. 296 00:22:53,280 --> 00:22:55,236 (Humming) 297 00:23:20,640 --> 00:23:23,393 - Here is the Pacific Ocean. - Yes, I see that. 298 00:23:25,040 --> 00:23:27,713 And who did that? 299 00:23:31,280 --> 00:23:33,748 Oh! Ooh! Oh! 300 00:23:35,040 --> 00:23:38,589 Oh, my goodness! My dear chap. 301 00:23:38,680 --> 00:23:41,240 - Better have a look. - This is an outrage! 302 00:23:41,320 --> 00:23:44,471 Whoever it is, they'll pay for this. The indignity! 303 00:23:44,560 --> 00:23:48,519 Mitchell! For heaven's sake, sit up, man. Ohh! 304 00:23:55,120 --> 00:23:57,156 (Conversing quietly) 305 00:23:57,240 --> 00:24:00,710 - Ground floor, please. - Staff may not use the lift. 306 00:24:00,800 --> 00:24:02,756 I'm not on the staff! 307 00:24:02,840 --> 00:24:04,398 Hey! 308 00:24:21,200 --> 00:24:22,838 Oh! 309 00:24:43,240 --> 00:24:45,470 Coming down! Look out, miss! 310 00:24:45,560 --> 00:24:47,516 (Giggling) 311 00:24:49,600 --> 00:24:51,556 Come here, my little duckling! 312 00:24:55,480 --> 00:24:57,675 Which floor is... 313 00:24:58,840 --> 00:25:00,796 Staff is not allowed to use the lift. 314 00:25:00,880 --> 00:25:03,474 Which floor is Mr Jackson on? He wants me. 315 00:25:03,560 --> 00:25:05,039 Oh. Sixth floor. 316 00:25:05,120 --> 00:25:09,671 Oh! I've gotta go up all those stairs again! 317 00:25:19,320 --> 00:25:22,915 You will be very careful with Mr Mitchell, please. 318 00:25:23,000 --> 00:25:25,833 - Norman. - You wanted to see me? 319 00:25:25,920 --> 00:25:29,469 I do indeed. So does the rest of the delegation. Come this way. 320 00:25:29,560 --> 00:25:33,030 Come this way, my boy. Just sit down there, would you? 321 00:25:33,120 --> 00:25:36,510 That's right. Norman, a catastrophe has happened. 322 00:25:36,600 --> 00:25:38,830 Mr Mitchell has been incapacitated. 323 00:25:38,920 --> 00:25:41,639 He only got hit on the head with a bowl. 324 00:25:41,720 --> 00:25:43,756 Oh. Er... 325 00:25:43,840 --> 00:25:46,308 Tomorrow's conference is worrying us. 326 00:25:46,400 --> 00:25:49,676 We'll only have five representatives. Everyone else has six. 327 00:25:49,760 --> 00:25:53,230 - We can't be outnumbered by Ecuador. - Nor the United States. 328 00:25:53,320 --> 00:25:55,595 - Good Lord, no. - No. 329 00:25:55,680 --> 00:25:59,229 - No. - And so...can you put up your hand? 330 00:26:04,880 --> 00:26:08,156 There's a clever boy. Gentlemen, I ask you. 331 00:26:10,080 --> 00:26:13,516 - Where did you learn to do that? - At school, if I wanted to go to... 332 00:26:13,600 --> 00:26:15,192 Naturally. 333 00:26:15,280 --> 00:26:19,239 Tomorrow, but only for tomorrow, you will take Mr Mitchell's place. 334 00:26:19,320 --> 00:26:22,676 - Me? - Yes. Just vote when I tell you to. 335 00:26:22,760 --> 00:26:25,274 I'm going to be a delegate? 336 00:26:25,360 --> 00:26:28,670 This is the unhappiest day of my life. The answer is yes. 337 00:26:28,760 --> 00:26:31,354 But only until Mr Mitchell returns. 338 00:26:31,440 --> 00:26:33,749 - I'll have a suit like yours? - Course. 339 00:26:33,840 --> 00:26:37,150 - And stripes all down me trousers? - Yes, indeed. 340 00:26:37,240 --> 00:26:40,038 One minute. I want a proper room. 341 00:26:40,120 --> 00:26:42,953 - With a window. - That's very difficult. 342 00:26:43,040 --> 00:26:46,350 Listen, no window...no delegate. 343 00:26:46,440 --> 00:26:48,396 (All talking at once) 344 00:26:48,480 --> 00:26:51,517 Phone down immediately. A large room with a window. 345 00:26:51,600 --> 00:26:53,909 - And I want a hat. - Yes, a hat. 346 00:26:54,000 --> 00:26:56,912 - Then I'll be the same as you! - Course you will! 347 00:26:57,000 --> 00:26:58,558 (Screaming) 348 00:26:58,640 --> 00:27:00,710 I'll be one of the delegation! 349 00:27:00,800 --> 00:27:03,712 This was Mr Mitchell's room, monsieur. 350 00:27:03,800 --> 00:27:06,519 Monsieur? Key. 351 00:27:21,120 --> 00:27:25,750 The gentleman who was moved into Room 600 may now use the lift. 352 00:27:25,840 --> 00:27:27,592 Bien. 353 00:27:35,960 --> 00:27:39,316 Hello? It's Room 600 'ere. 354 00:27:42,960 --> 00:27:46,509 (Posh voice) This is Mr Norman's secretary speaking. 355 00:27:46,600 --> 00:27:50,639 On his behalf, naturally. Cos he's having a bit of a kip, see. 356 00:27:51,200 --> 00:27:54,954 He's expecting his tailors, and as soon as they arrive... 357 00:27:55,040 --> 00:27:58,191 would you show them up? Splendid. 358 00:28:20,120 --> 00:28:21,997 - (Knocking) - Come in. 359 00:28:26,360 --> 00:28:28,271 You rang, sir? 360 00:28:28,360 --> 00:28:30,635 Cor! 361 00:28:30,720 --> 00:28:33,871 Er... Oh, er...I thought I was switching on the light. 362 00:28:33,960 --> 00:28:35,712 Oh. 363 00:28:35,800 --> 00:28:39,554 No, that is the light switch by your bed. 364 00:28:39,640 --> 00:28:41,153 And, er... 365 00:28:41,240 --> 00:28:43,310 this is the bell. 366 00:28:43,400 --> 00:28:45,789 And that is the telephone. 367 00:28:48,920 --> 00:28:52,629 But please, sir, ring again if you need anything. 368 00:28:53,680 --> 00:28:55,671 Erm...well, I'll... 369 00:29:27,200 --> 00:29:29,668 - (Knocking) - (Muffled) Come in! 370 00:29:31,400 --> 00:29:32,753 Ja? 371 00:29:37,160 --> 00:29:38,752 Nothing I want at all! 372 00:29:44,960 --> 00:29:48,635 La chambre six cents, s'il vous pla�t, mademoiselle. 373 00:29:49,360 --> 00:29:51,669 I'm in the bath! 374 00:29:51,760 --> 00:29:55,036 - (Knocking) - I'm in the bath! 375 00:29:55,120 --> 00:29:58,556 Bonjour, monsieur. Here we bring the new suit. 376 00:29:58,640 --> 00:30:02,110 - Oh, my conference clobber! - Bonjour, monsieur. 377 00:30:02,200 --> 00:30:05,909 - If monsieur is fit, we can fit. - Bonjour, monsieur. 378 00:30:09,720 --> 00:30:11,950 So! Bon! 379 00:30:12,040 --> 00:30:13,917 Bon, bon! 380 00:30:16,160 --> 00:30:21,314 Smashing, eh? I shan't need that any more, that's one thing. 381 00:30:22,400 --> 00:30:24,356 Smashing, isn't it, eh? 382 00:30:24,440 --> 00:30:26,510 Smashing! So... 383 00:30:28,920 --> 00:30:30,638 I thought... 384 00:30:30,720 --> 00:30:32,517 Hey, now, don't... 385 00:30:32,600 --> 00:30:34,989 (Tailors giggling and chattering) 386 00:30:38,360 --> 00:30:39,998 (Shouting) 387 00:30:40,080 --> 00:30:42,036 (All shouting) 388 00:30:42,120 --> 00:30:44,429 Oooh! 389 00:30:47,280 --> 00:30:49,748 (Confused shouting) 390 00:30:54,880 --> 00:30:56,871 Hilfe! Polizei! 391 00:30:59,120 --> 00:31:01,111 Polizei! 392 00:31:02,200 --> 00:31:04,953 Auf wiedersehen. Polizei! 393 00:31:12,880 --> 00:31:14,916 Fellow delegates, 394 00:31:15,000 --> 00:31:19,391 in this short survey, I have been quite unable... 395 00:31:27,840 --> 00:31:31,150 ..as one single vote against this resolution 396 00:31:31,240 --> 00:31:35,153 will set back the work of the six sub-committees 397 00:31:35,240 --> 00:31:37,549 and 12 sub-sub-committees 398 00:31:37,640 --> 00:31:39,232 - for 10 months. - Gracious! 399 00:31:39,320 --> 00:31:41,709 It is the earnest hope of my government 400 00:31:41,800 --> 00:31:46,396 that all delegates will give it their unanimous support. 401 00:31:46,480 --> 00:31:48,596 (Applause) 402 00:31:48,680 --> 00:31:51,752 We will now put this resolution to the vote. 403 00:31:51,840 --> 00:31:54,593 Those in favour, raise their hands. 404 00:32:11,440 --> 00:32:14,352 - Sonia Karol! - Sonia, darling. 405 00:32:14,440 --> 00:32:16,795 Oh, please! Thank you. 406 00:32:16,880 --> 00:32:20,111 - Would you like to name your... - I haven't decided yet. 407 00:32:24,920 --> 00:32:27,354 (Murmuring) 408 00:32:30,680 --> 00:32:34,070 This way to the distinguished visitors' gallery. 409 00:32:50,600 --> 00:32:52,875 And now the next question... 410 00:32:52,960 --> 00:32:55,952 Cor! Sonia Karol! 411 00:32:57,480 --> 00:32:59,436 (Murmuring) 412 00:33:00,680 --> 00:33:03,990 - Oh, I think you're smashing! - (Laughter) 413 00:33:08,040 --> 00:33:12,033 What's the matter with you lot? She is smashing! 414 00:33:12,120 --> 00:33:13,599 (lnaudible) 415 00:33:14,680 --> 00:33:17,956 I say she ought to be a delegate, that's what I say! 416 00:33:23,320 --> 00:33:27,438 I've seen all your films. I've got 107 of your pictures. 417 00:33:29,680 --> 00:33:31,272 What's the matter with you? 418 00:33:36,440 --> 00:33:40,433 The next question concerns the islands of Tawaki. 419 00:33:40,520 --> 00:33:44,399 The representatives from Tawaki, at the request of their queen, 420 00:33:44,480 --> 00:33:47,392 ask that discussion be postponed. 421 00:33:47,480 --> 00:33:50,950 The queen requires more time for consideration. 422 00:33:51,040 --> 00:33:53,713 Mr Chairman, I really must protest. 423 00:33:53,800 --> 00:33:58,157 This question has been raised three times and it's always postponed. 424 00:33:58,240 --> 00:34:02,279 We most definitely support the British in this matter. 425 00:34:03,360 --> 00:34:06,557 We too cannot agree to a further postponement. 426 00:34:06,640 --> 00:34:10,235 Under the rules of this conference, any delegate in favour 427 00:34:10,320 --> 00:34:13,949 of this postponement may use his right of veto. 428 00:34:22,480 --> 00:34:26,393 One of the British delegates has voted in favour of postponement. 429 00:34:32,200 --> 00:34:35,715 The Tawaki question postponed till next session. 430 00:34:36,800 --> 00:34:39,155 Get him out of here. Out. Quickly. 431 00:34:39,240 --> 00:34:42,118 - What are you doing? - You're wanted on the phone. 432 00:34:42,200 --> 00:34:45,590 - Who, me? - Yes. Through that door. 433 00:34:57,600 --> 00:34:59,716 Hello? 434 00:35:02,000 --> 00:35:04,878 Hello? Am I wanted on the phone? 435 00:35:04,960 --> 00:35:07,474 Well, I was told... 436 00:35:07,560 --> 00:35:09,835 Well, that's funny. 437 00:35:11,240 --> 00:35:14,118 ..dining with us. Nothing formal, mind you. 438 00:35:14,200 --> 00:35:16,760 We want to be very friendly with Tawaki. 439 00:35:16,840 --> 00:35:20,355 - Vodka and caviar, six o'clock. - A cocktail tonight? 440 00:35:20,440 --> 00:35:24,319 - Allow me, please... - Gentlemen, please excuse us. 441 00:35:25,440 --> 00:35:28,432 (All complaining) 442 00:35:28,520 --> 00:35:31,193 - (Knocking) - Come in. 443 00:35:35,920 --> 00:35:38,912 - Yes, gentlemen? - Greetings. 444 00:35:39,000 --> 00:35:41,912 - Did you want me on the blower? - Blower? 445 00:35:42,000 --> 00:35:44,036 Oh, telephone. Sorry. 446 00:35:44,120 --> 00:35:46,680 Allow us to introduce ourselves. 447 00:35:46,760 --> 00:35:49,115 He is Navu and I am Toki. 448 00:35:49,200 --> 00:35:53,432 We are from Tawaki and now, Honourable Sir... 449 00:35:56,320 --> 00:35:59,278 - My name's Norman. - Honourable Sir Norman. 450 00:35:59,360 --> 00:36:02,750 We are grateful that you are the only delegate to vote for us. 451 00:36:02,840 --> 00:36:05,035 Oh, that was all a mistake. 452 00:36:05,120 --> 00:36:09,636 Don't be so modest. You are a brave man. 453 00:36:09,720 --> 00:36:11,073 Am I? 454 00:36:11,160 --> 00:36:14,994 Yes. You have the power and influence to help our queen. 455 00:36:15,080 --> 00:36:16,479 Me? 456 00:36:16,560 --> 00:36:20,917 As you know, the great powers are trying to take one of our islands. 457 00:36:21,000 --> 00:36:22,956 Our queen is very sad. 458 00:36:23,040 --> 00:36:27,955 We in Tawaki wish to be left in peace and quiet, 459 00:36:28,040 --> 00:36:30,156 not to be a strategic centre. 460 00:36:30,240 --> 00:36:34,392 - Otherwise, you know what will happen? - No. 461 00:36:34,480 --> 00:36:38,473 Where once young lovers sang love songs under coconut trees 462 00:36:38,560 --> 00:36:42,155 there will be rough soldiers. 463 00:36:42,240 --> 00:36:46,313 Where now the young girls walk barefoot on golden sands, 464 00:36:46,400 --> 00:36:48,391 they will walk on chewing gum. 465 00:36:48,480 --> 00:36:50,596 (Tuts) 466 00:36:50,680 --> 00:36:54,832 And all the beautiful flowers will be choked by barbed wire. 467 00:36:54,920 --> 00:36:56,990 And our gentle queen will weep. 468 00:36:57,080 --> 00:37:02,234 - And our people will weep. - The tears of Tawaki will fall like rain. 469 00:37:03,480 --> 00:37:06,074 Bloomin' shame. 470 00:37:08,080 --> 00:37:11,152 - Mademoiselle? - The British delegation office? 471 00:37:11,240 --> 00:37:13,231 - A droit, mademoiselle. - Left? 472 00:37:13,320 --> 00:37:16,392 - No, no. To the right. - Thank you. 473 00:37:24,320 --> 00:37:27,949 Find out who is the British delegate who exercised the veto. 474 00:37:28,040 --> 00:37:30,634 - The Tawaki question didn't come up? - No. 475 00:37:30,720 --> 00:37:32,950 We were blocked by one man. 476 00:37:33,040 --> 00:37:35,634 You didn't tell me you were a delegate. 477 00:37:35,720 --> 00:37:38,075 I was terribly impressed. 478 00:37:38,160 --> 00:37:41,755 Oh, well... I wanted to keep it as a surprise. 479 00:37:41,840 --> 00:37:44,957 Tell me, why did you exercise your right to veto? 480 00:37:45,040 --> 00:37:47,110 - Hm? - Well... 481 00:37:47,200 --> 00:37:50,397 That! Someone's got to look after these people. 482 00:37:50,480 --> 00:37:53,472 It's not right the way they get kicked around. 483 00:37:53,560 --> 00:37:56,393 So I've written to their queen. Want to hear it? 484 00:37:56,480 --> 00:37:59,278 Yes, please. Well, not if it's private. 485 00:37:59,360 --> 00:38:02,477 Well, it is and it isn't. I'll read it to you. 486 00:38:02,560 --> 00:38:04,835 "Dear Queen, 487 00:38:04,920 --> 00:38:08,037 "I just heard everyone's trying to get your island. 488 00:38:08,120 --> 00:38:11,874 "The thought of barbed wire and chewing gum has made me very sad. 489 00:38:11,960 --> 00:38:15,635 "If I was you, I wouldn't let anyone land on any of my islands. 490 00:38:15,720 --> 00:38:18,029 "I am a member of the British delegation, 491 00:38:18,120 --> 00:38:21,157 "and you can count on me to look after your wishes. 492 00:38:21,240 --> 00:38:22,593 "And so, dear Queen, 493 00:38:22,680 --> 00:38:27,231 "hoping this finds you as it leaves me, affectionately yours, Norman." 494 00:38:28,320 --> 00:38:30,709 Norman, I think that's sweet of you. 495 00:38:33,640 --> 00:38:36,757 Monsieur et Madame Bertrand de Laine. 496 00:38:36,840 --> 00:38:40,116 Le Comte Antonio Riviera, G�n�ral Coropolos. 497 00:38:43,680 --> 00:38:45,989 Sir Humphrey and Lady Griffiths. 498 00:38:46,080 --> 00:38:48,435 Contessa et Signorina Cozzi. 499 00:38:48,520 --> 00:38:51,353 Mr, Mrs, Miss Joshua Rope. 500 00:38:57,160 --> 00:38:59,310 Mademoiselle Sonia Karol. 501 00:39:03,440 --> 00:39:06,034 Evening dress, sir, and by invitation only. 502 00:39:06,120 --> 00:39:10,591 I'm on the list. I'm one of the delegates. There you are...er... 503 00:39:10,680 --> 00:39:13,274 They missed me off again. Don't worry. 504 00:39:16,640 --> 00:39:20,315 I'm sorry, sir. Evening dress and by invitation only. 505 00:39:22,960 --> 00:39:26,236 - Isn't that De Groot? - I think you're right, sir. 506 00:39:32,200 --> 00:39:35,476 I hope Mitchell's evening dress is in here. Where is it? 507 00:39:35,560 --> 00:39:37,391 Right at the back, I suppose. 508 00:39:44,120 --> 00:39:46,429 I'll show 'em! Evening dress! 509 00:40:35,600 --> 00:40:37,909 - Hey, missus! - Monsieur! Attention! 510 00:40:38,000 --> 00:40:40,230 Oh, I'm sorry! 511 00:40:40,320 --> 00:40:41,799 Non, non! 512 00:40:43,520 --> 00:40:45,750 - Mes verres. Oh! - Oh. 513 00:40:45,840 --> 00:40:49,594 - Careful. - Ah. Ah, that's fine. 514 00:40:49,680 --> 00:40:53,992 - If you will permit me, sir... - Hey! Me neck! 515 00:40:56,120 --> 00:40:58,236 No, monsieur. No, no. 516 00:41:00,520 --> 00:41:02,112 Allow me. Thank you. 517 00:41:02,200 --> 00:41:04,350 I'm sorry, miss. I didn't do it on purpose. 518 00:41:05,520 --> 00:41:07,670 Hey! Hey, what's your game? 519 00:41:38,960 --> 00:41:40,473 Take it up. Sixth floor. 520 00:41:49,320 --> 00:41:51,834 There y'are. Evening dress. 521 00:41:56,160 --> 00:41:59,038 - Thank goodness that's over. - It was terrible! 522 00:41:59,120 --> 00:42:01,634 I would like to go to the Beau Rivage caf�. 523 00:42:01,720 --> 00:42:03,631 Well, let's go. 524 00:42:15,240 --> 00:42:18,516 - It's all right. - Oh, please. Be happy for my sake. 525 00:42:21,240 --> 00:42:23,117 Monsieur? 526 00:42:23,200 --> 00:42:25,873 Oh, er... Oh, coffee, please. 527 00:42:25,960 --> 00:42:28,110 When you bring it, just leave it here 528 00:42:28,200 --> 00:42:31,317 cos I'm gonna dance with the famous Miss Sonia Karol. 529 00:42:31,400 --> 00:42:32,799 Oui, monsieur. 530 00:42:32,880 --> 00:42:35,075 - Champagne. - Oui, monsieur. 531 00:42:40,320 --> 00:42:42,754 ..you don't play cricket? 532 00:42:50,160 --> 00:42:52,037 Your fan. 533 00:42:52,120 --> 00:42:54,793 Miss Karol, can I have a dance with you, please? 534 00:42:54,880 --> 00:42:58,919 Erm...I'm sorry. I'm much too tired. 535 00:42:59,000 --> 00:43:03,516 I won't dance quick. You can set the pace, long as I have one. 536 00:43:03,600 --> 00:43:06,717 I'm much too tired this evening. Please forgive me. 537 00:43:06,800 --> 00:43:08,836 I don't mind waiting. 538 00:43:08,920 --> 00:43:11,229 She said she's tired. 539 00:43:19,760 --> 00:43:21,478 Goodbye. 540 00:43:34,960 --> 00:43:38,555 I didn't dance cos she's tired and I didn't want to bother her. 541 00:43:38,640 --> 00:43:40,392 Yes, sir. 542 00:44:01,840 --> 00:44:03,432 (lnaudible over music) 543 00:44:23,600 --> 00:44:25,556 (lnaudible) 544 00:44:29,560 --> 00:44:37,990 545 00:44:38,080 --> 00:44:46,875 and what's wrong 546 00:44:46,960 --> 00:44:52,478 547 00:44:52,560 --> 00:44:57,350 548 00:44:57,440 --> 00:45:08,669 549 00:45:08,760 --> 00:45:14,835 550 00:45:14,920 --> 00:45:19,755 551 00:45:19,840 --> 00:45:25,631 552 00:45:25,720 --> 00:45:29,554 553 00:45:29,640 --> 00:45:35,237 554 00:45:35,320 --> 00:45:40,189 555 00:45:40,280 --> 00:45:46,799 556 00:45:46,880 --> 00:45:54,150 557 00:45:54,240 --> 00:46:02,158 558 00:46:02,240 --> 00:46:11,956 559 00:46:12,040 --> 00:46:17,717 560 00:46:17,800 --> 00:46:22,032 561 00:46:22,120 --> 00:46:27,990 562 00:46:29,440 --> 00:46:32,398 563 00:46:32,480 --> 00:46:42,799 564 00:46:43,880 --> 00:46:45,836 (Applause) 565 00:46:51,160 --> 00:46:52,673 Wonderful. 566 00:46:52,760 --> 00:46:55,115 - Oh, please go and see who it was. - Me? 567 00:46:55,200 --> 00:46:57,953 - Yes, please, hurry. - (Sighs) 568 00:47:14,920 --> 00:47:18,196 - News from Geneva, Mother? - Yes, dear. 569 00:47:18,280 --> 00:47:23,070 Toki says that all the great powers are offering great riches for Mahoola. 570 00:47:23,160 --> 00:47:27,438 But nobody lives there, Mother. The evil spirits are so strong! 571 00:47:27,520 --> 00:47:29,272 Even the volcano is dead! 572 00:47:29,360 --> 00:47:32,477 What harm could it do us if other people went there? 573 00:47:32,560 --> 00:47:37,236 We'd lose our peaceful way of living. Then what would the riches be worth? 574 00:47:37,320 --> 00:47:41,757 Now, what's this about? "Dear Queen, 575 00:47:41,840 --> 00:47:47,312 "I just heard everybody's trying to get your island. 576 00:47:47,400 --> 00:47:51,234 - "And I thought..." - Who's the letter from, Mother? 577 00:47:51,320 --> 00:47:54,710 "Affectionately yours, Norman." 578 00:47:54,800 --> 00:47:56,631 (Explosion) 579 00:47:57,800 --> 00:47:59,631 Mahoola speaks! 580 00:48:03,920 --> 00:48:06,354 An omen! A good omen! 581 00:48:06,440 --> 00:48:09,193 Who is he that writes and wants nothing from me? 582 00:48:09,280 --> 00:48:13,796 He is the one to trust. What he counsels, so will I decide. 583 00:48:13,880 --> 00:48:17,714 But Mr Jackson said I could be a delegate till Mr Mitchell got better! 584 00:48:17,800 --> 00:48:22,794 You did enough damage on your first and last appearance for our country. 585 00:48:22,880 --> 00:48:24,916 You said there were six and I... 586 00:48:25,000 --> 00:48:28,072 Norman, one thing seems to have escaped you. 587 00:48:28,160 --> 00:48:31,197 You are finally and definitely dismissed. 588 00:48:31,280 --> 00:48:33,840 You can't give me the sack! I won't take it! 589 00:48:33,920 --> 00:48:37,037 I'm a civil servant! I'm acting chief filing clerk! 590 00:48:37,120 --> 00:48:39,873 I'm as good as you. I have a bath every Sunday. 591 00:48:39,960 --> 00:48:42,758 Why should I be messed about? Take a running jump. 592 00:48:42,840 --> 00:48:45,149 (Phone) 593 00:48:45,240 --> 00:48:46,992 Hello? Hello. 594 00:48:47,080 --> 00:48:48,911 What is it? 595 00:48:49,000 --> 00:48:50,911 No. No. 596 00:48:51,000 --> 00:48:52,831 - Well, he ain't. - (Knocking) 597 00:48:54,880 --> 00:48:57,474 Isn't. 598 00:48:57,560 --> 00:48:59,073 Hello, Miss Penny. 599 00:48:59,160 --> 00:49:02,516 I was in the chamber. I thought you were ill or something. 600 00:49:02,600 --> 00:49:06,798 I did have a pain in me stomach so I couldn't vote. 601 00:49:06,880 --> 00:49:10,156 - Did you? - It's not the truth, really. 602 00:49:10,240 --> 00:49:13,038 Mr Jackson won't let me be a delegate any more. 603 00:49:13,120 --> 00:49:15,111 Oh. I see. 604 00:49:15,200 --> 00:49:16,997 - (Knocking) - Come in. 605 00:49:20,480 --> 00:49:22,710 Oh, hello! 606 00:49:22,800 --> 00:49:27,157 - This is Miss Penny Harvey. - Er...your woman? 607 00:49:27,240 --> 00:49:29,231 Well, er... 608 00:49:31,120 --> 00:49:34,476 Greetings to Honourable Sir Norman's woman. 609 00:49:34,560 --> 00:49:39,315 My queen sends this reply to your letter. 610 00:49:40,360 --> 00:49:44,592 "Her Most Excellent Majesty, the Queen of Tawaki, 611 00:49:44,680 --> 00:49:47,114 "requests me to thank the Honourable Sir Norman 612 00:49:47,200 --> 00:49:49,316 "for his most considerate letter, 613 00:49:49,400 --> 00:49:53,632 "and is very content to leave the interests of Tawaki in his good hands. 614 00:49:53,720 --> 00:49:56,712 "Until he advises her to agree to any nation's requests 615 00:49:56,800 --> 00:50:00,429 "for the right to establish a base on her island of Mahoola, 616 00:50:00,520 --> 00:50:03,557 "she will maintain a steadfast refusal. 617 00:50:03,640 --> 00:50:08,395 "Tahou Tanahoola, Secretary to Her Most Excellent Majesty." 618 00:50:10,680 --> 00:50:12,875 The love of the people of Tawaki 619 00:50:12,960 --> 00:50:15,793 is with the only white man who has written to their queen 620 00:50:15,880 --> 00:50:18,030 without hope of gain. 621 00:50:18,120 --> 00:50:22,750 Would Honourable Sir be gracious enough to give photo to take to queen? 622 00:50:29,000 --> 00:50:32,959 Such humility for so great a man to carry so small a photograph! 623 00:50:33,040 --> 00:50:37,352 It will be easy for the queen to carry with her always. 624 00:50:37,440 --> 00:50:40,591 Oh, yes, yes. She will be happy. 625 00:50:40,680 --> 00:50:44,673 Honourable Sir Norman, may your days be many. 626 00:50:44,760 --> 00:50:49,880 And may you have many sons, all like Honourable Sir Norman. 627 00:50:53,120 --> 00:50:55,111 Farewell. 628 00:51:02,080 --> 00:51:03,957 When he said about you having... 629 00:51:04,040 --> 00:51:06,952 If Sir Norman doesn't wipe that grin off his face, 630 00:51:07,040 --> 00:51:09,634 Sir Norman's woman will wipe it off for him. 631 00:51:09,720 --> 00:51:13,349 The leader of the Brodnian delegation is expecting to see you. 632 00:51:13,440 --> 00:51:17,558 Until Honourable Sir Norman say yes, my queen say nobody come to Mahoola. 633 00:51:17,640 --> 00:51:20,313 - But he is waiting! - If Honourable Norman say no, 634 00:51:20,400 --> 00:51:22,356 nothing doing. 635 00:51:28,000 --> 00:51:30,036 - Well? - Nothing doing. 636 00:51:30,120 --> 00:51:32,714 Except through this Honourable Sir Norman. 637 00:51:32,800 --> 00:51:36,554 It seems that the queen of Tawaki trusts him implicitly. 638 00:51:38,840 --> 00:51:43,914 It would be better if this Honourable Sir Norman would be out of the way. 639 00:52:11,080 --> 00:52:13,355 (Ship's whistle) 640 00:52:15,280 --> 00:52:17,748 Hello, Penny. 641 00:52:17,840 --> 00:52:19,910 - Am I late? - No, I just got here. 642 00:52:20,000 --> 00:52:21,877 - Good. True? - True. 643 00:52:21,960 --> 00:52:24,872 - What would you like? - Coffee, please. 644 00:52:24,960 --> 00:52:26,712 - Monsieur? - Two coffees. 645 00:52:26,800 --> 00:52:29,678 - Black or white? - Just brown. 646 00:52:29,760 --> 00:52:31,671 - OK. - Bags of sugar. 647 00:52:32,960 --> 00:52:35,952 Do you have to chain that case to your wrist? 648 00:52:36,040 --> 00:52:39,430 Well, as a delegate, you've got to be careful. 649 00:52:39,520 --> 00:52:42,990 Excuse me, have I the honour to address Mr Norman? 650 00:52:43,080 --> 00:52:44,513 That's right. 651 00:52:44,600 --> 00:52:49,390 I have been requested to hand this into your own safekeeping. 652 00:52:49,480 --> 00:52:52,392 - What is it? - A small token of appreciation 653 00:52:52,480 --> 00:52:54,994 from the conference committee. 654 00:52:55,080 --> 00:52:57,958 - Thank you. - In the meantime, may I suggest - 655 00:52:58,040 --> 00:53:01,589 it is very valuable - that you put it in a safe place. 656 00:53:01,680 --> 00:53:05,559 Perhaps it would be best in the despatch case, no? 657 00:53:05,640 --> 00:53:07,870 That's a good idea. 658 00:53:12,040 --> 00:53:13,951 Allow me. 659 00:53:16,120 --> 00:53:18,873 Thank you. Now it's as safe as the Bank of England. 660 00:53:18,960 --> 00:53:22,236 Excellent. Mademoiselle. Monsieur. 661 00:53:22,320 --> 00:53:27,110 - That was very nice of him, wasn't it? - I'm not so sure. 662 00:53:27,200 --> 00:53:28,792 (Ticking) 663 00:53:29,880 --> 00:53:32,633 - Hey, Norman! Listen! - What are you doing? 664 00:53:32,720 --> 00:53:36,269 - It's ticking! - Yes. Perhaps it's a clock! 665 00:53:36,360 --> 00:53:38,351 It's a bomb! 666 00:53:38,440 --> 00:53:40,476 Where's the key? 667 00:53:41,560 --> 00:53:43,710 I don't know! I had it a minute ago! 668 00:53:44,800 --> 00:53:46,756 That man! He pinched the key! 669 00:53:46,840 --> 00:53:50,116 - Can't you undo the chain? - That one's in the hotel! 670 00:53:50,200 --> 00:53:53,431 - It's going to explode! - You go away! Run for it! 671 00:53:53,520 --> 00:53:57,638 - No, or I shall never see you again! - It's making a funny noise now! 672 00:53:57,720 --> 00:53:59,358 (Shrieking) 673 00:54:04,880 --> 00:54:07,599 It's still ticking! Stay where you are! 674 00:54:07,680 --> 00:54:10,399 - What are you going to do? - Get the other key! 675 00:54:11,680 --> 00:54:14,399 (Shrieking) Get out, everyone! It's a bomb! 676 00:54:14,480 --> 00:54:16,994 Get out of the way, everybody! 677 00:54:20,880 --> 00:54:22,950 (Gibbering) 678 00:54:23,040 --> 00:54:24,996 Sir, no! Excuse me, sir. 679 00:54:25,080 --> 00:54:27,878 Please, use the lift. The manager says you can. 680 00:54:27,960 --> 00:54:30,235 - Hurry up. - You are going up, sir? 681 00:54:30,320 --> 00:54:32,515 Yeah, any minute now. 682 00:54:36,640 --> 00:54:38,358 Wait for me! 683 00:54:46,400 --> 00:54:48,550 Where's the key? 684 00:54:48,640 --> 00:54:50,631 I'm going to get blown up in a minute! 685 00:54:50,720 --> 00:54:52,517 Oh, got it! I got it! 686 00:54:57,880 --> 00:54:59,757 Argh! Oi! Oi! 687 00:55:09,160 --> 00:55:11,151 I'll see you on the ground floor. 688 00:55:11,240 --> 00:55:13,196 - Not using the lift? - Not me. 689 00:55:13,280 --> 00:55:17,114 - This is making a funny noise. - It'll do better than that in a minute. 690 00:55:20,560 --> 00:55:24,030 The lift! Hey! Hey! It's a bomb! 691 00:55:26,400 --> 00:55:29,437 It's a bomb! Look out! Look out! 692 00:55:31,080 --> 00:55:33,878 Stay clear! Bomb! Hey! 693 00:55:41,560 --> 00:55:42,993 Monsieur! 694 00:55:43,080 --> 00:55:45,640 - No! - Vous avez laiss� quelque chose! 695 00:55:45,720 --> 00:55:50,316 I don't want it! It's a bomb! We'll both get killed! 696 00:55:50,400 --> 00:55:51,515 Oui, oui, oui. 697 00:55:51,600 --> 00:55:54,194 Leave it on the seat and mind your own business! 698 00:55:54,280 --> 00:55:56,589 Monsieur! 699 00:55:56,680 --> 00:55:59,717 Out of the way! It's a bomb! lt'll go off in a minute! 700 00:56:04,640 --> 00:56:08,030 Oh, no! Shoo! Shoo! 701 00:56:09,040 --> 00:56:10,758 Shoo! Shoo! 702 00:56:12,240 --> 00:56:14,356 Get out of it! Shoo! 703 00:56:14,440 --> 00:56:17,671 Watch out! Oh, no! 704 00:56:17,760 --> 00:56:19,637 Go away! Go on! Hop it! 705 00:56:19,720 --> 00:56:21,358 Go on! Go! 706 00:56:21,440 --> 00:56:23,749 Get out of it! lt'll go up in a minute! 707 00:56:25,480 --> 00:56:28,392 Go away! Go on, hop it! Go on! 708 00:56:28,480 --> 00:56:29,879 Oh, God! 709 00:56:29,960 --> 00:56:32,758 - Go away! - I thought you got rid of it! 710 00:56:32,840 --> 00:56:33,989 No! Run! Run! 711 00:56:36,040 --> 00:56:39,953 - What did you do with the bomb? - Threw it on that waste ground. 712 00:56:40,040 --> 00:56:42,600 - It'll go up in a minute. - (Ticking) 713 00:56:44,640 --> 00:56:46,596 What's that? 714 00:56:46,680 --> 00:56:48,750 Sounds near, doesn't it? 715 00:57:18,840 --> 00:57:21,638 - Well? - It didn't work. 716 00:57:24,400 --> 00:57:26,709 What do you mean, it didn't work? 717 00:57:26,800 --> 00:57:30,918 - The bomb worked, but he escaped. - You...you moron! 718 00:57:31,000 --> 00:57:32,752 You...you fool! 719 00:57:39,800 --> 00:57:43,156 Oh, darling, would you come here a minute, please? 720 00:57:43,240 --> 00:57:44,912 Yes, right away. 721 00:57:45,000 --> 00:57:48,675 Believe me, Chief, it wasn't easy. 722 00:57:48,760 --> 00:57:53,675 It was an important job and you bungled it, you useless idiot. 723 00:57:57,520 --> 00:58:01,672 - Well? - Darling, I have a job for you. 724 00:58:01,760 --> 00:58:03,512 OK. 725 00:58:16,920 --> 00:58:18,558 (Norman laughing) 726 00:58:19,640 --> 00:58:23,918 I'll tell you what. I'll get packed and then we'll have some dinner. 727 00:58:24,000 --> 00:58:27,037 - In our little caf�? - Yes, in our own little caf�. 728 00:58:27,120 --> 00:58:29,998 How lovely, Norman. That'll be wonderful. 729 00:58:30,080 --> 00:58:33,789 Yes. Then we'll catch a plane for London together. 730 00:58:33,880 --> 00:58:35,632 - Good. - So you get packed. 731 00:58:35,720 --> 00:58:37,073 But I have packed. 732 00:58:37,160 --> 00:58:39,549 - Have you stuck your labels on? - Oh, no! 733 00:58:39,640 --> 00:58:43,519 Stick your labels on, then I'll meet you at 9:00 as we arranged. 734 00:58:43,600 --> 00:58:45,511 All right. Goodbye. 735 00:58:45,600 --> 00:58:47,431 Bye. 736 00:59:06,920 --> 00:59:08,990 (Mouthing) 737 00:59:23,920 --> 00:59:25,797 Won't you sit down? 738 00:59:32,040 --> 00:59:34,838 I want to apologise to you, little man. 739 00:59:35,920 --> 00:59:39,151 - Yeah? - I want us to be friends. 740 00:59:39,240 --> 00:59:41,549 Real friends. 741 00:59:41,640 --> 00:59:43,437 That suits me! 742 00:59:43,520 --> 00:59:46,796 Oh, I'm so glad! 743 00:59:47,880 --> 00:59:50,633 Shall I go and get you a bottle of ginger beer? 744 00:59:50,720 --> 00:59:54,554 I have a better idea, my friend. You shall have dinner with me. 745 00:59:54,640 --> 00:59:56,710 Oh, I couldn't do that. 746 00:59:56,800 --> 00:59:58,631 Alone. 747 00:59:58,720 --> 01:00:00,915 Oh, yeah! 748 01:00:03,160 --> 01:00:07,472 Oh, I've...I've got a date. I've got to go back to...London. 749 01:00:07,560 --> 01:00:11,155 - There is plenty of time for all that! - Yeah? 750 01:00:13,120 --> 01:00:14,951 Tell me... 751 01:00:15,040 --> 01:00:18,999 have you ever seen the view of the lake from the mountainside? 752 01:00:20,560 --> 01:00:23,233 - No. - Oh, you must. 753 01:00:23,320 --> 01:00:26,596 I will show you everything this evening. 754 01:00:26,680 --> 01:00:29,240 (Gurgles) 755 01:00:29,320 --> 01:00:31,993 My car will call for you, then, at 8:30. 756 01:00:33,080 --> 01:00:35,230 Goodbye. 757 01:00:42,640 --> 01:00:44,596 (Doorbell) 758 01:00:50,200 --> 01:00:52,509 - It's me. - Well, come in! 759 01:00:52,600 --> 01:00:55,558 - Come on. - All right, then. 760 01:01:06,200 --> 01:01:08,555 I nearly forgot. I brought you these. 761 01:01:08,640 --> 01:01:11,029 How nice of you! 762 01:01:11,120 --> 01:01:13,076 They're flowers. 763 01:01:13,160 --> 01:01:15,879 Well, put them down and come along in. 764 01:01:20,640 --> 01:01:23,029 (Parrot) Not there, you fool! 765 01:01:25,000 --> 01:01:26,638 Oh dear, oh dear, oh dear. 766 01:01:27,960 --> 01:01:29,996 Where am I gonna put 'em, then? 767 01:01:30,080 --> 01:01:31,957 Oh... 768 01:01:42,680 --> 01:01:44,113 Norman... 769 01:01:44,200 --> 01:01:46,077 come here. 770 01:01:55,720 --> 01:01:58,154 Come and sit down next to me. 771 01:01:59,360 --> 01:02:01,430 Not there. Here. 772 01:02:05,400 --> 01:02:07,356 Closer. 773 01:02:08,960 --> 01:02:11,428 - Closer. - More? 774 01:02:14,800 --> 01:02:16,995 There we are. 775 01:02:23,760 --> 01:02:25,751 (Giddy gurgling) 776 01:02:25,840 --> 01:02:29,355 What is the matter? Don't you like me? 777 01:02:29,440 --> 01:02:32,989 - Oh, yeah. Smashing. - Well, then? 778 01:02:33,080 --> 01:02:35,150 Oh! Ah! 779 01:02:39,680 --> 01:02:44,515 Norman? My cigarettes. They are in my bedroom. 780 01:02:44,600 --> 01:02:46,511 Would you get them for me? 781 01:02:46,600 --> 01:02:48,591 Straightaway. 782 01:02:54,760 --> 01:02:56,318 (Gunshot) 783 01:03:02,040 --> 01:03:03,519 (Gunshot) 784 01:03:04,320 --> 01:03:06,276 (Pop!) 785 01:03:06,360 --> 01:03:09,272 Please help me, Norman! There you are. 786 01:03:17,040 --> 01:03:19,156 Oh, Norman, do please come and sit down. 787 01:03:30,240 --> 01:03:31,832 Do you want a cigarette? 788 01:03:31,920 --> 01:03:34,514 - I never use them. - Nonsense. 789 01:03:34,600 --> 01:03:36,830 Here you are. Puff. 790 01:03:40,040 --> 01:03:42,156 Ah! 791 01:03:42,240 --> 01:03:44,196 Give us a hand. 792 01:03:44,280 --> 01:03:45,998 Hey! 793 01:03:47,720 --> 01:03:49,711 Oh, come here. Give it to me. 794 01:03:51,920 --> 01:03:53,911 And give me that. 795 01:03:57,160 --> 01:03:59,116 - Huh? - Oh... 796 01:04:02,920 --> 01:04:05,832 Oh, Norman, would you do me another favour? 797 01:04:05,920 --> 01:04:09,708 Would you get my slippers? They're beside the mirror. 798 01:04:09,800 --> 01:04:11,950 - Yeah. - Go on, now. 799 01:04:21,400 --> 01:04:23,231 Hey! Hey! 800 01:04:32,520 --> 01:04:35,830 - You dirty, rotten crooks! - Go on, you fools! 801 01:04:35,920 --> 01:04:39,549 How did I fall in love with you? Fancy you mixed up with this lot. 802 01:04:39,640 --> 01:04:41,835 Now, keep away! Help! 803 01:04:44,800 --> 01:04:47,268 Help! I'm being attacked! Hey! 804 01:04:48,360 --> 01:04:51,670 Help! Hello? Help! Fire! 805 01:04:51,760 --> 01:04:54,672 - He's on the end! - Do something! Use your knife! 806 01:04:54,760 --> 01:04:58,469 - Help! Ah! Hello! - (Man) 'Hold on, please.' 807 01:04:58,560 --> 01:05:00,357 I am holding on! 808 01:05:03,640 --> 01:05:08,430 - Monsieur, what are you doing? - I was on the phone and I got cut off. 809 01:05:14,440 --> 01:05:17,079 Would you fasten your seatbelt, madam? 810 01:05:17,160 --> 01:05:19,913 - Good heavens! - Oh! 811 01:05:29,560 --> 01:05:31,391 Well, I... 812 01:05:50,880 --> 01:05:53,678 Gentlemen, the Queen of Tawaki says no. 813 01:05:53,760 --> 01:05:55,751 What? 814 01:05:55,840 --> 01:05:58,513 (Translates in Russian) 815 01:06:01,800 --> 01:06:04,394 (Translates into Chinese) 816 01:06:04,480 --> 01:06:07,756 You mean, the decision must be left to your government? 817 01:06:07,840 --> 01:06:10,115 - No. - Your queen? 818 01:06:10,200 --> 01:06:13,033 - No. - For heavens' sake, who is it left to? 819 01:06:13,120 --> 01:06:16,829 Honourable Sir Norman. He look after queen's wishes. 820 01:06:16,920 --> 01:06:19,992 - Who's Honourable Sir Norman? - Never heard of him. 821 01:06:20,080 --> 01:06:21,991 Er...allow me. 822 01:06:24,920 --> 01:06:27,593 Don't know him. Would you, er... 823 01:06:27,680 --> 01:06:30,148 - You know this fellow? - No. 824 01:06:30,240 --> 01:06:33,277 - But you must know him. - No. 825 01:06:33,360 --> 01:06:35,590 Do you know him? 826 01:06:35,680 --> 01:06:38,069 - Good gracious! - What? 827 01:06:40,040 --> 01:06:41,758 Norman! 828 01:06:41,840 --> 01:06:46,038 You mean this man is the man the Queen will listen to? 829 01:06:46,120 --> 01:06:49,192 That is so. Honourable Sir Norman. 830 01:06:55,400 --> 01:07:00,428 Are you telling me that this little filing clerk has the Queen's ear? 831 01:07:00,520 --> 01:07:05,310 - Yes, Sir Horace. But don't ask me how. - Dash it, man, I do ask you! 832 01:07:06,360 --> 01:07:10,478 - Are you sure it's the same Norman? - Undoubtedly, Sir Horace. 833 01:07:10,560 --> 01:07:13,950 Did you instruct him to take any part in the negotiations? 834 01:07:14,040 --> 01:07:16,190 Indeed I did not, sir. 835 01:07:16,280 --> 01:07:18,350 Get him here! Get him here at once! 836 01:07:19,600 --> 01:07:22,319 - I, er... - Well, man? Well? 837 01:07:22,400 --> 01:07:25,949 - I have a confession to make. - Get on with it! 838 01:07:26,040 --> 01:07:29,032 I fired him, sir. I sacked him. 839 01:07:29,120 --> 01:07:31,076 You what?! 840 01:07:31,160 --> 01:07:33,390 Now, where is it? 841 01:07:33,480 --> 01:07:34,754 There. 842 01:07:34,840 --> 01:07:36,956 Now, what are you going to say? 843 01:07:39,280 --> 01:07:42,431 "Please, Sir Horace, can I have my old job back? 844 01:07:42,520 --> 01:07:45,478 - "Cos..." Oh, I can't! - Hey. 845 01:07:46,680 --> 01:07:50,195 Jump to it! Put the international police on the job. 846 01:07:50,280 --> 01:07:55,308 Send out a search party! And get Norman what's-his-name, whatever the cost. 847 01:07:55,400 --> 01:07:57,914 "Please, Sir Horace, can I have me old job back? 848 01:07:58,000 --> 01:08:00,912 "Cos Penny won't marry me unless I do get it back 849 01:08:01,000 --> 01:08:03,389 - "and she's the girl for me." - Yes. 850 01:08:08,320 --> 01:08:10,595 (Sir Horace, bellowing) Come in! 851 01:08:12,600 --> 01:08:14,556 Good luck. 852 01:08:18,400 --> 01:08:21,597 - Well? What do you want? - That's him er...he, sir. 853 01:08:21,680 --> 01:08:24,672 - Who? - Honourable Norman. I mean, Norman. 854 01:08:24,760 --> 01:08:28,548 My boy, how good to see you. Come along this way, please. 855 01:08:28,640 --> 01:08:30,756 - Here he is. Norman. - Sir Horace... 856 01:08:30,840 --> 01:08:35,789 My dear fellow. My dear Norman. I'm delighted to see you. Delighted. 857 01:08:35,880 --> 01:08:38,952 Now, then, Norman. May I call you Norman? 858 01:08:39,040 --> 01:08:41,395 - The cabinet will be told. - Told what? 859 01:08:41,480 --> 01:08:44,119 Oh, come now. No mock modesty. 860 01:08:44,200 --> 01:08:46,953 - Mock who? - Splendid work. 861 01:08:47,040 --> 01:08:49,429 I'm delighted. An excellent move. 862 01:08:49,520 --> 01:08:53,593 So the Queen of Tawaki relies on you entirely, eh? 863 01:08:53,680 --> 01:08:56,672 You could say we're pen pals. 864 01:08:56,760 --> 01:08:59,479 Pals, eh? Ha, ha. Yes, yes, of course. 865 01:08:59,560 --> 01:09:02,279 Pals, eh? Well, my dear Norman. 866 01:09:02,360 --> 01:09:05,432 The Ministry is pleased. Very pleased, indeed. 867 01:09:05,520 --> 01:09:08,159 In fact, we're giving a little party for you. 868 01:09:08,240 --> 01:09:11,312 - A little soir�e. - I'd sooner have a party, sir. 869 01:09:11,400 --> 01:09:14,710 Of course. A little diplomatic get-together, eh? 870 01:09:14,800 --> 01:09:18,349 I think the government will want you to complete your mission. 871 01:09:18,440 --> 01:09:21,716 - Sir Horace, can I have me job back? - Why, of course! 872 01:09:21,800 --> 01:09:24,837 - Penny? Can she come to the party? - His fianc�e. 873 01:09:24,920 --> 01:09:28,071 - Delighted. - Oh, good! Hey, Penny! 874 01:09:28,160 --> 01:09:30,958 You can come in now! I've got it! 875 01:09:37,640 --> 01:09:41,918 - Shall we look at some furniture first? - Oh, yeah. 876 01:09:42,000 --> 01:09:44,992 - Oh, can I help you? - In a little while. 877 01:09:45,080 --> 01:09:48,436 - We're just having a look round. - Very good, sir. 878 01:09:56,480 --> 01:09:58,471 (Music starts) 879 01:10:03,920 --> 01:10:10,712 880 01:10:10,800 --> 01:10:16,193 881 01:10:16,280 --> 01:10:22,628 If you will close your eyes 882 01:10:22,720 --> 01:10:26,759 883 01:10:26,840 --> 01:10:33,359 884 01:10:33,440 --> 01:10:38,275 - Painted white? - 885 01:10:38,360 --> 01:10:44,754 886 01:10:45,840 --> 01:10:50,231 887 01:10:51,760 --> 01:10:58,108 I've made a good impression 888 01:10:58,200 --> 01:11:06,073 you're my one obsession 889 01:11:06,160 --> 01:11:11,109 I can't afford to miss 890 01:11:11,200 --> 01:11:18,436 with "vacant possession" 891 01:11:18,520 --> 01:11:25,392 892 01:11:25,480 --> 01:11:30,315 893 01:11:30,400 --> 01:11:34,518 894 01:11:34,600 --> 01:11:38,036 895 01:11:38,120 --> 01:11:42,955 896 01:11:43,040 --> 01:11:52,711 897 01:12:21,440 --> 01:12:24,477 898 01:12:24,560 --> 01:12:29,634 899 01:12:29,720 --> 01:12:44,238 900 01:12:45,920 --> 01:12:47,751 Do you take me for a raving lunatic? 901 01:12:47,840 --> 01:12:51,230 Sir, the Queen of Tawaki is under the impression 902 01:12:51,320 --> 01:12:54,756 she conducted her negotiations with a titled diplomat - 903 01:12:54,840 --> 01:12:57,229 Honourable Sir Norman. 904 01:12:57,320 --> 01:12:59,834 - You mean I... - I'm afraid so, sir. 905 01:12:59,920 --> 01:13:02,912 You must recommend him for a knighthood. 906 01:13:07,840 --> 01:13:09,910 Oh, no! 907 01:13:23,080 --> 01:13:26,834 - Well done, Sir Norman! - Well done! 908 01:13:34,880 --> 01:13:37,758 General, you know this guy Norman? 909 01:13:37,840 --> 01:13:41,435 The one who has the inside track with the Queen of Tawaki? 910 01:13:41,520 --> 01:13:45,479 - The British have just decorated him. - Trying to steal a march? 911 01:13:45,560 --> 01:13:48,518 - What do you figure we should do? - Well... 912 01:13:48,600 --> 01:13:51,194 Anything the British can do, we can do. 913 01:13:52,280 --> 01:13:55,511 Washington. Decorations Board. 914 01:13:55,600 --> 01:13:57,556 (Speaking Chinese) 915 01:14:15,840 --> 01:14:19,355 ..present you with the Brodnian Order of the Blue Dahlia 916 01:14:19,440 --> 01:14:22,512 for courage and service to diplomacy. 917 01:14:31,800 --> 01:14:33,518 You know Mr Jackson? 918 01:14:35,040 --> 01:14:37,918 Jackson. Jackson, Jackson. 919 01:14:38,000 --> 01:14:41,117 - Young man, if you don't behave... - Name's Norman. 920 01:14:41,200 --> 01:14:43,395 Sir Norman, Jackson. 921 01:14:43,480 --> 01:14:46,199 Very well. To remind you, Sir Norman, 922 01:14:46,280 --> 01:14:49,909 you are due at the television studios for Town Topics. 923 01:14:50,000 --> 01:14:52,309 We leave on the stroke of ten. 924 01:14:52,400 --> 01:14:55,039 My dear Jackson, such efficiency. 925 01:14:55,120 --> 01:14:57,588 You really are hot stuff. Isn't he? 926 01:14:59,880 --> 01:15:02,758 Norman, I've just thought of something. 927 01:15:02,840 --> 01:15:06,355 When we're married, I shall be Lady Norman, won't I? 928 01:15:06,440 --> 01:15:08,954 - You're a lady now. - Thank you. 929 01:15:09,040 --> 01:15:13,113 You know your instructions. Concentrate on the girl. 930 01:15:13,200 --> 01:15:15,794 If we get her, we've really got Norman. 931 01:15:15,880 --> 01:15:19,589 Only need a fairy on me head and I'll look like a Christmas tree. 932 01:15:19,680 --> 01:15:22,717 - Good evening. - They'll take a lot of living up to. 933 01:15:22,800 --> 01:15:26,918 - Why? - Norman, you haven't earned them yet. 934 01:15:27,000 --> 01:15:31,232 - Then why did they give them to me? - They all want part of Tawaki. 935 01:15:31,320 --> 01:15:35,836 But I can't do them any favours. I've got to look after the Queen. 936 01:15:35,920 --> 01:15:39,196 I want to be loyal but I can't let them mess about... 937 01:15:41,480 --> 01:15:43,710 - Oh, no. - Exactly. 938 01:15:43,800 --> 01:15:46,109 Honourable Sir Norman's on the spot. 939 01:15:46,200 --> 01:15:49,590 Then they can keep their medals. I don't want them. 940 01:15:49,680 --> 01:15:51,796 - I'll give them back now. - No! No! 941 01:15:51,880 --> 01:15:56,715 Ah, there you are. The car to take you to the television studio is here. 942 01:15:56,800 --> 01:16:00,156 - Hey, I want to talk to you. - Later, Norman. 943 01:16:03,880 --> 01:16:05,791 - Hello, Mac. - Hello. 944 01:16:05,880 --> 01:16:08,155 - What are you doing? - Town Topics. 945 01:16:08,240 --> 01:16:09,832 - Again? - And you? 946 01:16:09,920 --> 01:16:12,878 - A Greek play. - Again? 947 01:16:12,960 --> 01:16:14,712 - Mister? - What? 948 01:16:14,800 --> 01:16:16,631 - Now? - No, no, not now. 949 01:16:21,600 --> 01:16:23,591 Your jolly good health. 950 01:16:26,120 --> 01:16:30,398 'Good evening. This is another edition of Television Town Topics, 951 01:16:30,480 --> 01:16:34,758 'in which we present interesting people who are in the news today.' 952 01:16:34,840 --> 01:16:36,478 All our worries are over! 953 01:16:36,560 --> 01:16:41,315 And here is our first guest, the distinguished diplomat 954 01:16:41,400 --> 01:16:45,279 who one might justly describe as "the man of the moment". 955 01:16:47,440 --> 01:16:50,477 If you want to see, there's a little room up there. 956 01:16:50,560 --> 01:16:52,232 Thank you. 957 01:16:54,920 --> 01:16:56,672 Erm... Well, Sir Norman, 958 01:16:56,760 --> 01:17:01,072 would you tell us what you intend to do about the Tawaki imbroglio? 959 01:17:02,160 --> 01:17:05,232 - Pardon? - The Tawaki imbroglio. 960 01:17:06,320 --> 01:17:08,914 Oh, er... Oh, well, erm... 961 01:17:09,000 --> 01:17:11,639 I shall turn it over in me mind. 962 01:17:11,720 --> 01:17:13,517 Splendid. 963 01:17:21,920 --> 01:17:26,710 And another thing what I've made up me mind I'm going to do is, erm... 964 01:17:26,800 --> 01:17:30,793 I'm going to sort out everything so everyone gets a fair chance, 965 01:17:30,880 --> 01:17:34,111 - like, all round. - Splendid. 966 01:17:35,720 --> 01:17:38,393 Sir Norman, I understand that you are engaged. 967 01:17:38,480 --> 01:17:40,232 Oh, yeah. 968 01:17:40,320 --> 01:17:42,595 My fianc�e's here. 969 01:17:42,680 --> 01:17:44,875 She's up there having a look. 970 01:17:46,160 --> 01:17:49,038 I wonder if we might ask you her name. 971 01:17:49,120 --> 01:17:51,350 Penny! 972 01:17:53,040 --> 01:17:54,951 'Thank you, Sir Norman.' 973 01:17:55,040 --> 01:17:57,190 (Screaming) Help! 974 01:18:01,360 --> 01:18:06,388 Now the mixture's perfectly blended and the souffl�'s ready for the oven. 975 01:18:06,480 --> 01:18:10,029 Marvellous. Now, the oven is at 450 degrees. 976 01:18:11,120 --> 01:18:14,396 - Help me, please! Help! - My souffl�! 977 01:18:14,480 --> 01:18:16,596 - Penny! - Oh, no! 978 01:18:16,680 --> 01:18:19,513 - Hey! - Get out of my kitchen! 979 01:18:19,600 --> 01:18:22,910 - Get out of my kitchen! - Penny! Penny! 980 01:18:23,000 --> 01:18:24,149 Help! 981 01:18:24,240 --> 01:18:26,151 ( 982 01:18:26,240 --> 01:18:29,312 Help! I'm being kidnapped by Brodnians! 983 01:18:32,000 --> 01:18:33,399 (Drum flourish) 984 01:18:34,720 --> 01:18:36,472 - Oh! - (Laughter) 985 01:18:36,560 --> 01:18:38,471 Hey! Hey! 986 01:18:39,960 --> 01:18:42,474 (Screams) Help! Stop! 987 01:18:42,560 --> 01:18:45,472 - Dad, where's Pat? - She'll be back soon. 988 01:18:45,560 --> 01:18:50,475 - What's her new boyfriend like? - Very nice. Reliable type. Unlike you. 989 01:18:50,560 --> 01:18:53,393 No good will come of it. Mark my words. 990 01:18:53,640 --> 01:18:56,632 (Screaming) Help! Help! Help! 991 01:18:57,960 --> 01:19:01,873 - Pat's got one of her headaches again. - (Screaming) 992 01:19:03,160 --> 01:19:05,674 I want me elevenses. 993 01:19:06,640 --> 01:19:09,837 Help! I'm being kidnapped by two Brodnians! 994 01:19:09,920 --> 01:19:13,390 - Very nice too, my dear. - Who is that wretched girl? 995 01:19:16,880 --> 01:19:18,552 (Penny) Help me, please! 996 01:19:18,640 --> 01:19:21,552 Grab this, Penny! Come on! Grab hold! 997 01:19:21,640 --> 01:19:23,835 Yes! Hold on! 998 01:19:27,080 --> 01:19:28,991 Get the police, Penny! Quick! 999 01:19:38,600 --> 01:19:42,388 Next comes Yvonne, in a coral chiffon evening dress 1000 01:19:42,480 --> 01:19:44,436 for dinner and dancing. 1001 01:19:47,120 --> 01:19:50,829 It's Percy. In an evening dress... I mean, a suit, 1002 01:19:50,920 --> 01:19:55,516 with a white tie... and, er, he has trousers... 1003 01:19:55,600 --> 01:19:57,318 of course...and tails... 1004 01:19:57,400 --> 01:20:00,597 with a white tie and a waistcoat to match... 1005 01:20:00,680 --> 01:20:03,148 Trousers and tails. 1006 01:20:03,240 --> 01:20:05,629 And you'll notice that... 1007 01:20:11,640 --> 01:20:14,950 All right, Charlie. All right, Joe. You've had it. Back up. 1008 01:20:15,040 --> 01:20:18,476 I think we'll send you to the country for a long holiday. 1009 01:20:18,560 --> 01:20:21,472 Sir, these two ruffians won't bother you again. 1010 01:20:21,560 --> 01:20:24,791 I'm Inspector Fabian of Scotland Yard. 1011 01:20:24,880 --> 01:20:28,759 Thank goodness! I've had a terrible time. We've been running... 1012 01:20:28,840 --> 01:20:31,673 - Go away! Get out! - What are you talking about? 1013 01:20:31,840 --> 01:20:35,833 - There they are, Inspector. Arrest them! - Go away. 1014 01:20:35,920 --> 01:20:40,198 It's my duty to arrest you. Anything you say will be taken down and... 1015 01:20:44,320 --> 01:20:46,390 Ain't you going to arrest them? 1016 01:20:54,720 --> 01:20:58,315 It's perfectly blended and the souffl�'s ready for the oven. 1017 01:20:58,400 --> 01:21:01,631 I'll check that the oven's at the right temperature. 1018 01:21:01,720 --> 01:21:04,188 This oven should be at 450 degrees... 1019 01:21:04,280 --> 01:21:06,157 Stay out! Stay out! 1020 01:21:07,120 --> 01:21:09,236 Cop this lot! 1021 01:21:09,320 --> 01:21:14,155 If you try to get hold of me Penny you'll get more than you bargained for! 1022 01:21:14,240 --> 01:21:16,800 No, no, no! Not my souffl�! 1023 01:21:23,560 --> 01:21:26,518 Clean yourself up and make the next one. 1024 01:21:26,600 --> 01:21:28,750 ( 1025 01:21:35,760 --> 01:21:37,318 That's better. 1026 01:21:37,400 --> 01:21:42,474 'The city of Troy is besieged. The Greeks are at our very gates.' 1027 01:21:42,560 --> 01:21:46,951 - 'Brave Hector will save us.' - (All) Brave Hector will save us. 1028 01:21:47,040 --> 01:21:51,113 - (Man on stage) Where is Brave Hector? - (All) Where is Brave Hector? 1029 01:21:51,200 --> 01:21:53,111 Don't be daft! 1030 01:21:53,200 --> 01:21:55,839 (Man on stage) Where is Brave Hector? 1031 01:22:09,040 --> 01:22:10,871 Don't mess about! 1032 01:22:10,960 --> 01:22:12,916 - Oh! - (All) Enter Grecians. 1033 01:22:13,840 --> 01:22:16,513 The Greeks bring us a gift of a strange wooden horse. 1034 01:22:16,600 --> 01:22:20,957 - Brave Hector will save us! - (All) Brave Hector will save us! 1035 01:22:30,600 --> 01:22:32,397 (All shouting) 1036 01:22:41,240 --> 01:22:42,832 Catch! 1037 01:22:44,760 --> 01:22:46,751 Thank you. 1038 01:22:46,840 --> 01:22:48,592 From madam. 1039 01:22:48,680 --> 01:22:50,796 Temper. 1040 01:22:50,880 --> 01:22:53,758 - Now? - All right. I'm coming! 1041 01:22:55,160 --> 01:22:58,470 Do something! What? I couldn't care less. 1042 01:23:00,720 --> 01:23:02,551 No! No! No! 1043 01:23:06,960 --> 01:23:09,474 What do you think you're doing? Get out! 1044 01:23:09,560 --> 01:23:11,710 (Whistle) 1045 01:23:13,520 --> 01:23:17,433 Look! I'm the producer of this play. Get out of here at once! 1046 01:23:17,520 --> 01:23:21,991 That'll show you, trying to kidnap Penny. Now you're for the high jump! 1047 01:23:26,520 --> 01:23:28,272 My souffl�! 1048 01:23:30,960 --> 01:23:32,916 Eugh. 1049 01:23:37,600 --> 01:23:40,433 You have a duty to perform for your country. 1050 01:23:40,520 --> 01:23:42,636 So make it sound convincing. 1051 01:23:42,720 --> 01:23:46,030 I don't want to let the Queen down. I promised Penny. 1052 01:23:46,120 --> 01:23:48,588 - Yes, he did. - Stop this nonsense. 1053 01:23:56,360 --> 01:23:57,998 Welcome to our domain. 1054 01:23:58,080 --> 01:24:02,471 I owe you a debt of considerable gratitude, Honourable Sir Norman. 1055 01:24:02,560 --> 01:24:05,518 It's nothing. I'd like to have a little chat... 1056 01:24:05,600 --> 01:24:09,912 Your Majesty, we are here today at the special instigation of our government 1057 01:24:10,000 --> 01:24:12,958 to discuss with you the possibility and desirability 1058 01:24:13,040 --> 01:24:16,635 to grant concessions on Mahoola solely to our government. 1059 01:24:16,720 --> 01:24:19,359 Oh, Jackson, pack it up. 1060 01:24:19,440 --> 01:24:21,829 Whereon, if it is agreeable to you, 1061 01:24:21,920 --> 01:24:25,708 it is the purpose of my government, when those rights are assigned, 1062 01:24:25,800 --> 01:24:29,315 that we will use the island as a base for experiments. 1063 01:24:29,400 --> 01:24:31,277 If it is agreeable to Your Majesty, 1064 01:24:31,360 --> 01:24:36,115 it is further understood that for the experiments to be conducted properly, 1065 01:24:36,200 --> 01:24:40,034 certain precautions will be necessary to safeguard secrecy. 1066 01:24:40,120 --> 01:24:42,998 We will be allowed to patrol in territorial waters 1067 01:24:43,080 --> 01:24:47,756 here before called the Tawakian Sea. With this in...view, we... 1068 01:24:51,080 --> 01:24:54,629 It's gone! It's gone! It's gone! 1069 01:24:55,305 --> 01:25:01,876 Support us and become VIP member to remove all ads from OpenSubtitles.org